I was able to regain my summer job and I started working at the thrift shop again on weekends!! Yesterday was my first day back, and I absolutely love it there and I am really excited to work there for the rest of the year!

Today I am thankful for my friends who let me DJ their dance this weekend! :) 

I appreciate my new friend from Germany/Austria (she has lived in both) who always volunteers me for solos in chorus because she likes my voice.

Today I am thankful for the foreign exchange student who told me my name was very pretty.

Today I am thankful for the happiness of my friends.

Just some thoughts

I said to my parents last night that I don’t think I have ever seen an ugly girl. They looked at me odd, and tried to think of girls who may be ugly. But nothing they could say changed my mind.

I truly think all women are beautiful. And here is why:

Being a girl myself, I know that sometimes being a girl really sucks. However, I live in a country where I can get a free education without fear of being shot because of my gender, which is a privilege that thousands of girls do not have yet. And yet these young women still get up and go to school everyday, despite being told they can’t.

I have seen sexual harassment (hell, Just the other day some random man shouted out his car window about how nice my t-and-a’s were). I have seen my friends terrified to go into school because of this harassment and abuse. And yet they are at school every morning and still carrying on even though they have this in their lives.

My mom spent years trying to conceive when when she finally did, she had complete placenta previa (I spelled that wrong) when she was pregnant with me. Basically, the entire placenta had embedded itself into he uterus almost killing me and her, and due to the fact I was a premature it was a very serious case. My mom went through a lot of pain with that pregnancy, both physical and emotional and yet still decided to have me. And that takes a lot of bravery and bad ass-ery to do in my humble opinion.

I don’t see peoples physical appearances a lot. Yes, I acknowledge their existence (that person has black skin, that person has blue eyes, that person is tall, etc), but I do not form my opinions and judgements of beauty on what I see based on physical appearance. I see beauty as something more than what is on our skin. Beauty is taking pride in what the outside of your body looks like. And beauty is being brave and intelligent and caring. The word “beauty” isn’t an adjective I use to describe physical appearances, I guess would be the right way to put it.

But looking at physical appearances, humans are beautiful. Our bodies are amazing. The way scar tissue forms and heals to protect us. The freckles we get and hair that we are born with. Strong legs to keep us balanced and grounded. And arms that are not necessarily perfect, but are amazing to hug. A tummy that holds all our insides together, and has the perfect curves to have a kitty sit on it. Lungs that can inhale and exhale well enough to be alive. Thoughts and words and ideas and everything together. The combination of things is what makes girls beautiful, and because I can see these things inside every single girl, I see their physical appearances as beautiful.

Maybe I am just overly optimistic, or maybe I am not explaining myself correctly. But I think girls are pretty no matter what they look like and nothing can change my opinion on this.

Today I am thankful for shopping with my bestie. We went to all the stores, bought fun hats and khakis and made friends with everyone working there.

I love talking to strangers. I am very bubbly and I absolutely love engaging in a conversation with someone I don’t know. I like seeing their laughs. And maybe it will be the only time they laugh that day. And that’s why I try and converse with everyone I meet.

Also I am thankful for Ben and Jerry’s. Because it is magical.

Today I am thankful for the progress I have made in the past two years.

I am more confident, have a better self esteem and body image, I manage stress and emotions better, and over all I am more happier than I have ever been.

This time in my life is the first time I can say that I am beautiful despite my acne and stretch marks. This is the first time I can say that life is beautiful despite its ups and downs and occasional thunderstorms. And I am so overjoyed and proud with this discovery.

Daily schedule for the school year

My life is crazy, I know….

  • Wake up 5:30AM. Do some yoga (helps with my anxiety).
  • Hit the shower, get dressed, make-up, contacts, teeth, etc.
  • BREAKFAST TIME!! Protein smoothie, toast w/ pb, bagel…
  • Wait for the bus.
  • Bus ride from 7-7:30ish

School starts at 8AM:

  1. AP United States History
  2. AP Physics
  3. AP English Language and Composition
  4. Ballet
  5. Spanish 2
  6. Chorus
  7. Honors Algebra 2
  8. Study Hall

(Note that I do not have lunch… my plan is to bring healthy snacks in that will add up to a full meal and eat when I can.)

Then we go to extra circulars:

  • School ends @ 2:45pm
  • Go to rehearsal (Musical, Select Chorus). This gets done between 5-7pm.
  • Drive home and have dinner.
  • Homework until 10-12pm
  • Sleep.
  • Repeat.

Also work on some Saturdays (?). I need to call my boss…

Events I will be partaking in this year (*pending):

  • Musical
  • Select Chorus
  • Madrigal Festival/ Burlington Trip
  • Select Chorus School Tours
  • All New England’s Music Festival*
  • All State’s Music Festival*
  • North Country Music Festival (Districts)*
  • LSC Upward Bound
  • Italy Trip 2015

Goodbye sleep. Hello life. 

Today, I am thankful for an awesome weekend with friends, tattoos, fried food, and the beautiful beaches of the cape!